Not Entering Sin for the Sustenance of Children
One of the greatest trials of this worldly life is spouses and children. Human nature nurtures deep affection and love for their offspring; however, this love should not lead a person to violate Allah’s boundaries or enter into forbidden acts out of fear of sustenance. The esteemed Geylani draws this balance as follows: “Ask Allah for the sustenance of your children… Their nourishment does not fall upon you when they grow up. Do not commit errors for them.” A person who eats the rights of others under the pretext of securing their child’s worldly future, neglects obligatory worship, or steps outside the bounds of what is permissible, is actually consigning his own afterlife to fire. The family’s livelihood should be sought through legitimate means, and the ultimate result must be left entirely to the Absolute Sustainer.
Teaching the Values of Allah to the Family
The greatest legacy that parents can leave for their children is not wealth but a consciousness of contentment and piety. “Teach your self and your children contentment. Make them content with what they have.” With a deeper spiritual awareness, one must avoid filling the heart with love for children while forgetting Allah. “Teach your child the value of everything; then separate yourself from them. Subdue your nafs (ego), and be occupied with your Lord.” This “separation” is not about abandoning the family and going to the mountains, but after fulfilling their responsibilities towards them properly, establishing the primary focus in one’s heart as solely the Creator, and preventing children from becoming a thick veil (shirk) between oneself and Allah.
The True Sense of Trust
A perfect believer accepts his spouse and children as trusts given to him by Allah. He loves them, protects them, raises them with an Islamic upbringing; but this love should never surpass the love for Allah or contradict His commands. Even while being tender towards them, he knows that Allah is the one who provides sustenance and decrees destiny. Parents who guide their families on the path of truth in the transient worldly life will also experience eternal familial happiness together in the most beautiful ranks of Paradise in the afterlife.