NICAH SECTION · 24 – OBTAINING THE WOMAN'S PERMISSION TO MARRY
Abū Hurayrah, may Allah be pleased with him, narrated:
The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said: "A virgin must not be married without her permission (her verbal consent), nor a widow without the command (verbal consent) being taken from her."
The Companions asked: “O Messenger of Allah, what is the permission of the virgin?”
The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, replied: "Her silence." [110]
**COMMENTARY:**
This hadith serves as apparent evidence that a marriage contract is invalid if the permission of a virgin girl is not obtained, and that the marriages of widows are invalid unless their consent is verbally expressed. This is the view of the Hanafi, Awza’i, Sufyan al-Thawri schools of thought. According to Shafi'i, Malikite, Ahmad ibn Hanbal, and Ishaq ibn Rahuwayh, a father can marry off his virgin daughter without obtaining her permission, because obtaining her consent is meant to please her, but it is not obligatory; it does not affect the validity of the contract. (Mealim al-Sunan, vol. 3, p. 36)
Abu Hurayra, may Allah be pleased with him, narrated:
The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings upon him, said: "The consent of a female orphan regarding herself is taken. If she remains silent, her silence is her consent. And if she does not give permission, then marriage to her is forbidden."
Muḥammad ibn ‘Amr transmitted this hadith through the same chain of narrators, with the addition: "If a virgin girl weeps or remains silent." The word "weeps" was added.
Abū Dāwūd said: Abū ‘Amr, relating on the authority of Zukwan, who narrates from Aishah (may Allah be pleased with her): Aishah (may Allah be pleased with her) said, “O Messenger of Allah, a virgin girl feels shame to speak.” The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings upon him) said, "The silence of a virgin is an acknowledgement."
Umar ibn al-Khattab (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated:
The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings upon him) said: "Consult with women regarding their affairs."
COMMENTARY:
A father should consult with his wife when giving away his daughter. If he intends to marry her to someone, he should seek her permission; otherwise, both his own home and his daughter’s home will be filled with discord.